When you experience the death of a pet, it shakes you to your very being. But, of course, we don’t expect little furry faces to impact our lives as they do. But the emotional impact of losing animals takes a toll on you. And tears are a normal, healthy part of grieving.
My Dog Died and I Can’t Stop Crying. Why?
I cried uncontrollably for days after my toy poodle, Corey, died. I felt utterly inconsolable, maybe even a little crazy. However, crying helped soothe the grief I felt over my loss. The tears provided an outlet for my feelings. They spoke the words that my mouth could not find. Crying after my dog died helped me to begin healing.
The Science Of Emotional Tears
Let’s look at the science behind our tears. Humans are hard-wired to cry. And we are the only animals who cry from sadness. Some researchers found that emotional tears contain leucine-enkephalin. It’s an endorphin that improves mood and reduces pain.
Scientists collected tears from two study groups: those cutting onions and those watching sad movies. They then discovered the chemicals from emotional tears help your body release toxins and waste products.
Some scientists believe there is truth to the adage, “Have a good cry.” Emotional tears clear the body of stress-related toxins and help you feel less pain. So from a scientific standpoint, tears are good for you.
Another study proves what most of us already know: women cry more often than men. That’s because women have about 60% more prolactin in their bodies than men. Prolactin is a protein that revs up the endocrine system. And that makes you more likely to cry.
Men also sweat more than women. And sweat releases many of the same chemicals and endorphins in emotional tears. So that’s another reason they cry less often.
My Cat Died and I Can’t Stop Crying. What to Do?
Other research ties the suppression of emotional tears to increased hypertension and heart disease risks. So psychologists agree you should talk through your grief and cry when you feel it. Tears are good for your heart and processing feelings.
Since tears help your body restore to a normal status quo, they are a significant component of self-care routines. So allow yourself time to grieve your pet. And know that it’s okay to admit, “My cat died, and I can’t stop crying.”
Think of shedding tears in the same light as sweating. Your body sweats when you’re too hot as a way of trying to cool yourself down. So by the same token, your body cries to release feel-good endorphins to lower your pain.
In the days after your dog or cat or any pet dies, you experience acute pain. So it is normal and common to cry uncontrollably. Tears are your body’s way of processing the shock of loss.
Understanding The Strong Emotions Of Losing A Pet
Sometimes the feelings of sadness over losing a pet are worse if you decided to put your pet down. For example, I felt ill-prepared for the heartbreak of losing a dog. But I felt devastated knowing my actions ended his life. Even though I acted under the veterinarian’s direction, I still felt unbelievable guilt.
Maybe you are experiencing some of these feelings. You know you made the right choice for your pet. But it still hurts beyond comprehension. And you can’t quit crying.
You are not alone. The human to animal bond is powerfully strong. And many factors play into how you respond to grief.
- Your stage of life
- The type of bond you shared with your pet
- Your pet’s age or health
- Your family background and influence
- Your religious and cultural background
The type of sadness and grief you experience may be heavily tied to your pet’s age and health. For example, if your puppy escapes her leash and is hit by a car, you may feel more guilt than if your dog dies of old age.
In addition, the relationship you shared with your pet is likely different than your relationship with other pets. When I lost my little poodle, I couldn’t stop crying for days, maybe a week. But years later, after losing my next beloved dog, I didn’t cry as long. It’s not that I loved Buddy any less. If anything, I had a stronger bond with him.
But Corey died as my children were growing up and leaving home. So it was something of a one-two punch. My life circumstances played a role in mourning the loss of my pet. Yours will too.
What To Do If My Pet Died And I Can’t Stop Crying?
First, be patient with yourself. Everyone experiences grief differently. And there is no right or wrong way to grieve. Here are a few steps to take to begin processing your loss after your pet dies.
- Examine the other things going on in your life. Perhaps, like my situation, the loss of your furry friend compounded other events. In combination with other issues, you may find yourself spinning.
- Talk to a grief counselor or to a friend who has lost a pet. Those conversations help celebrate all that you loved about your dog or cat. And they help you process the grief.
- Write in a journal. Sometimes it’s easier to write out our emotions. Putting pen to paper soothes my soul, and maybe it will help you too.
- Let yourself feel angry. Scream your frustration to the heavens. Pound your hands into a pillow. It’s a natural part of mourning.
- Take a day off of work and go for a hike. If the weather is bad, walk laps inside a local mall. A little bit of exercise lifts your spirits.
- Call a friend and let them know you need their support. Invite them over for a tasty cocktail and a good cry.
Related: 15 Lovely Backyard Pet Grave Ideas (For Dogs and Cats)
Rest In Peace, My Dog Quotes
Sometimes knowing that others have walked the same path and understand your sadness is helpful. So here are some quotes for dog and cat owners who’ve lost their best friends.
- I loved you your whole life. I’ll miss you for the rest of mine.
- Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.
- Dogs leave paw prints on our hearts.
- A dog wags his tale with his whole heart.
- “A person who has never owned a dog has missed a wonderful part of life” – Bob Barker
- We’ll meet again in heaven. Until then I miss you more than words can say.
- “If there are no dogs in heaven, then when I die, I want to go where they went.” – Will Rogers
- The most difficult thing about having a dog is the goodbye.
- If you don’t own a dog at least once, there is not necessarily anything wrong with you. But there may be something wrong with your life.
- “Until one has loved an animal, a part of one’s soul remains unawakened.” — Anatole France
Related: 15 Touching Pet Loss Quotes And Poems
Short Message For My Dog Who Passed Away
Dear Buddy, You were my best good friend, and I miss you every day. Pictures of you regularly fill my Facebook memories. And I swear I took more pictures of you than of my human children! Seeing your little furry face brings a smile to my lips, even while tears run down my cheeks. I know you were met by everyone who loved you on the other side of the Rainbow Bridge. And I know one day, I will see you too. You are my dear fur friend, and I look forward to playing ball again.
Conclusion
Losing a pet feels devastating. If your beloved cat or dog has died and you can’t quit crying, you are still normal. You are not going crazy. And you are not losing your mind.
The mourning process takes time. And no one can tell you that you’ve been sad long enough. You will know when it’s time to take the next step forward. The stages of grief for a beloved pet are the same as for any other type of loss. So don’t let anyone shush you by saying, “It was only an animal.”
- Denial is the first stage of grief. You may deny the situation rather than facing the pain.
- Anger often comes next. You may feel anger over your pet’s illness or that you couldn’t save him. Rage makes us feel less vulnerable than pain.
- Many people feel depression next. “My dog died and I can’t quit crying” is a normal stage of grieving.
- Bargaining comes next. We try to bargain or reason our way out of finality’s truth. You may feel guilt here.
- Acceptance finally comes as we work through our emotions. It doesn’t mean you’re happy about the death. Only that you accept it. You come to some peace. And you allow yourself to move forward.
Be patient. Cry when you feel the need. Share your grief with a friend.
